Emotional Intelligence
What is Emotional Intelligence?
Emotional intelligence (aka eq, emotional quotient) is the ability to
manage ones emotions. Understanding, observing and using ones emotions
to then benefit ones self positively to communicate effectively, avoid
or defuse conflict, connect with others and understand their perspective
to empathize, overcome obstacles and relieve stress in everyday life.
This practice helps one build strong relationships with others, and
succeed in everyday life areas more than they would without strong eq.
Overall it's a conscious awareness of ones emotions and using eq to
drive a positive reaction. Some examples of eq are:
- Taking responsibility for mistakes/errors
- Managing emotions well in a difficult situation
- Being able to let go of past mistakes
- Being aware of ones limitations and strengths
- Being able to read between the lines of what someone is saying, observing how they may feel
According to research, EQ has four key skills:
- Self-management - Being able to control ones behaviour and feelings, managing emotions in a healthy, positive way. Adapting to circumstances, using initiative and being able to keep your word when it comes to commitments
- Self-awareness - Being aware of how you're feeling and how those feelings may contribute to your behaviour/reaction. Knowing yourself, your strengths and weaknesses
- Social awareness - Being able to connect with others, understand their perspective, to empathize with them and understand.
- Relationship management - Having to ability to have good relationships with others and maintaining that level, communicating well and managing conflict, being a team player and being able to usher inspiration/influence over others
How is EQ different to IQ? Why is EQ important?
Let's quickly cover what IQ is. IQ is intelligence quotient. It's a measurement of a persons intelligence. This is usually done through an IQ test, giving the person a score to define their IQ. The test result calculations these days are usually compared to others of the same age group as the test taker.
EQ and IQ are both as important as each other. Some researchers suggest that EQ forms the foundation of all your interactions with others, even when learning. For example being able to listen and absorb what a teacher is teaching. Therefore, this can affect ones IQ. Other researchers say that EQ's affect on ones life is pretty low when it comes to success. But when you think about it. Having a high IQ may land you a top of the line job, but having a good EQ will ultimately determine how well you operate in that job, especially if it involves leadership and collaboration. EQ and IQ are complementary to each other and work together.
This leads us to why EQ is important. Having good emotional intelligence is key for interacting with others. It will determine how one engages and connects with others, how they communicate, empathize, understand others emotions or reasons why they did something and comes the ability of being compassionate. Everyday life is full of surprises, ups and downs. Being emotionally intelligent helps you deal with the cards you are dealt, and determines how you respond. Being in touch with ones emotions can be very helpful when it comes to navigating everyday life. It helps said person manage relationships with others in a positive way and also themselves. I will leave you with a poem from Maya Angelou
"People will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel."